The daughter he never had
by hazelsnowdrop
Summary: The spell worked. She found her father or he found her. How will she explain to the brothers who she is and they will believe her ? Autors note: I don t know if I will continue this story. Since I realized how much I struggle with long work.
1. Chapter 1

_The daughter he never had_

_She had her fathers, dirty blond hair and his freckles._

_His taste in cars and music. The love for food. _

_She had her mothers hazel eyes and her curly hair. _

_Her naivety and her stubbornness._

_Her grandmothers nose and her big heart. _

_Her grandfathers smile and his love for story´s._

_She had her uncles dimples. She like her uncle_

_would fall asleep, when Soft-rock stared to play._

_Sophie, the name her mother wanted to give her. _

_Sophie, the name her father gave her instead. _

Sophie was born on March 13.1998 in Ames,Iowa. Her mother Ela Warren died giving birth to her. Her father didn´t know about her till she turned one. Her mothers and fathers relationship, was only based on sex. He was in town Ela didn´t know why nor did she care. After she found out she was pregnant, she decided to keep the baby and raise it. By then Dean Winchester left, without the knowledge, of the infant growing in her womb. Ela knew she was to young, after all she recently turned 19. But it was her, who acted irresponsible and so she, had to face the consequences. That´s what she told herself. Not once did she regret the choice she made. Ela was exited and dreamed of the day holding her daughter in her arms. Her dreams were destroyed, when her doctor told her, she would not survive the pregnancy. She made her parents promise her, not to find Sophie´s father. George and Julie could not refuse, their only child´s wish. But when Sophie became five months old, her grandparent were trying to find Dean Winchester. It was cruel for both child and father to be separated. On Sophie´s first birthday George and Julie finally found Dean Winchester. Within two hours he warmed up to her and couldn´t imagine a life without her. Being in the arms of a stranger scared Sophie. At first she tried to wiggle her self out of Dean´s embrace. Reaching for her grandparents. She cried about 15 minutes and then gave up struggling. Everything was on edge when Dean missed to show up on her second birthday. Few weeks after her birthday he came later to her baptism. Which he was against. On some day´s he forget to call. That´s when Sophie´s grandparent´s thought, their daughter was right about Dean Winchester. He wasn´t father materiel. Soon after Dean proved them wrong. He called thrice a day. Every second day he would drive from South Dakota to Ames, Iowa.

At the age of eight, Sophie´s grandfather died from lung cancer. Sophie missed her grandpa. She saw him getting weaker and weaker day after day. Every night, George would climb in her tiny bed, and read her bedtime stories. He would play his with Violin for her and Sophie would dance around him. George promised teaching her who to play but he got sick. It was unexpected and lasted two years. After her husbands death Julie became to weak, to take care of Sophie. She was admitted to a nursing home. On Julie´s birthdays and holidays Dean took his daughter to visit her grandma. Two years later she passed away. Sophie had to move in with her father. That´s when she met Bobby. From then on the Singer Salvage Yard became her new home. Father and daughter found it hard to live together. The sudden change in her life, for a kid in her age was huge. She barely eat and spoke with neither of them them. It toke her two months to start to speak again. To feel comfortable with her father being around her the whole time. Moving away also meant new school. New teachers and new kids. Too much new for a kid to handle. Dean wanted for his daughter too have a normal life. He knew it was impossible. Since he had no intention to quiet hunting. So he signed her in a swimming course but also in a self defense class. At least, she should learn how to defend herself. She was doing fine in school, considering how shy she had been at first. She made two friends Ivan a Spanish boy and Emily a German girl. Her school was full with kid´s with different backgrounds. Her swim course had a new member just like her. His name was Kevin and he was 3 year older. She liked Kevin he was always nice to her and shared his gummy bears. In her self defense class, she made friends with Chloe and Ethan who were twins.


	2. Chapter 2

_**The daughter he never had**_

**Singer´s Salvage Yard **

_It was the fourth day of her father´s death. The fourth day of a fatherless and motherless child. _

Sophie couldn´t sleep and an attempt of closing her eyes, were greeted with dark thoughts.

For a young girl, Sophie lost to many people in her life. Her mother died giving birth to her. Her grandfather died of lung cancer. Two years after that her grandmother passed away. And then her father died four days ago in a car accident.

She thought of ending her life. To be united with her father and grandparents. But death scared her. Still the thought crossed her more than once a day. There were many ways to commit suicide. She would choose to swallow pills. A easy death. A death for a coward so she thought.

Her fathers side of family were unknown to her. Sure she knew he had a younger brother named Sam. Who left the family with 18 to study in California. His mother Mary died burning on the ceiling. Her fathers father John died on a hunt, in the same year her grandfather died. Dean never talked to much about his family but he told his daughter the ugly truth.

Sam is the only one alive. But Sam doesn´t know about his brothers death. Sophie doubted that Sam cared. After all he left and never called. She never heard her father talk about his younger brother. Not with Bobby. Not with Benny. No one. The only thing he had of his brother were some old photos and the amulet which he never took off.

Sophie felt so alone and lost. So numb and tired. The little family father and daughter had, were unable to reach her. They were behind walls so thick and unbreakable. Four restless nights and four numb days. But Sophie couldn´t live without her father any longer. Maybe I can find something in uncle Bobby´s books, she thought to herself. Not being to able to sleep, clouded her mind with dark thoughts. It was 3:24 in the morning, when she went downstairs to the living room. Carefully to not wake Benny up, who was sleeping on the the living-rooms sofa. Both of them were staying at Bobby´s and neither of them knew for how long.

Bobby´s house was full. 7 people under one roof. Garth and Charlie came three days ago to be there for Sophie. To help her, to support her. Every evening Mrs. Tran and Kevin would come over and have dinner. Pretending maybe even ignoring the lose of one person. They acted like he was late for dinner. But then dinner was over and he still hadn´t come.

Although Benny and Sophie could stay as long as they wanted, they wanted to run away. Before Dean´s accident the three of them lived together. But after Dean´s death neither could stay. Not when every corner of the apartment reminded them of Dean. Benny moved in two years ago, after he and Sophie met on a hunt. Some Vampires kidnapped her to threaten her father. To leave them and there nest alone. Benny had been the one who saved her. It was Sophie´s first and last hunt.

She walked to the desk and sat down turning the desk-lamp on. Minutes passed by. She just sat there and touched the desk, here eyes were closed. Trying to recall times when she helped Bobby with research. When the three of them sat and disgusted the hunt. She breathed in but her fathers scent vanished. Instead she smelt the old books. The carpet and the leather.

Benny decided to break the silence."Why your up ?" he asked. Here eyes opened slowly. She didn´t flinch nor was she scared. These days nothing had an effect to her. Everybody knew why but she wouldn´t let them in. Wouldn´t let anyone help her not even Benny. He was the closet thing she had as a father. As a brother and a friend. He filled those parts Sophie´s father couldn´t reach. Something indescribably but good and nice. "I thought you were asleep ?,"she asked confused. Her eyes but told another story. The fourth sleepless night was the second story.

He shook his head. "Can´t and you ?" Benny said already knowing the answer. His eyes were on every of her movement. She stood up and felt as if she weight a ton. Her fingers touched the desk gingerly on last time. She wanted to stand there and not move. Every step she took made her feet, her legs more heavy. And it spread quickly to her whole body. Then she finally dropped herself on the sofa.

Benny´s body heat beside her made her feel warm and comfortable. She wanted to move closer and rest her head on his shoulder."I can´t sleep either," she sighed and leaned her head back. She starved to be touched by Benny. But felt she had no right to ask. Not right to want anything fro m anyone. She thought as herself as a burden. Both of them sat in silence till the sun rose and the day began.


	3. Chapter 3 part 1

**The morning**

Three hours passed by in complete silence. To fast for Sophie´s taste. She wished minutes would last longer. Benny only had caressed her hair. But she hungered for more. She wanted to be held by him. And feel his warmth around her. Lay her head on his shoulder, and hear him evenly breath. He was the only comfort she had left. Of course she would want these things and more. But Benny who once made her feel more wanted, more cared for and more loved, failed. The man who improved father and daughter´s relationship, failed.

But she didn´t blame him. Because she thought, she had no right to ask him anyhow. No right to want anything from him or anyone else. So she build a wall around herself. A wall she did not realize she build. It made it harder for them to help her, she knew that. But Sophie didn´t want any help. She had to go alone through that. Something she believed had no other way. Not only would it be selfish to ask. It would be selfish to need. That´s what she thought. And if Sophie believed in anything, she held on it tight.

" I´m going today...you and I...we both need more stuff..." Benny said unsure. Unsure if he should have had mention it to her at all. Unsure of what her reaction might be. Because he feared that she would panic again. Like yesterday evening. Freak out and beg Benny not to leaver her alone. But she didn´t respond and he began to worry. What happened yesterday, was never going to happen again she promised herself. Now that her father was gone she had to be strong for herself.

For Benny it felt like, he lost not only Dean but Sophie too. Seeing her in great pain, losing herself from day to day gathered an unimaginably pain in him. He wished he could do something. Anything. But he wasn´t her father. That´s what he told himself over and over. To ease the pain. After minutes of silence and no response, Benny stood up and headed to the kitchen. To prepare the breakfast. Since the day the moved in with father and daughter, Benny made the breakfast. And there was no objection. From neither of them.

The first to wake up was Avery. Like ever morning, she made hot chocolate for Sophie. And every morning, Sophie refused to touch it. Sophie loved hot chocolate in the mornings. Everday her father would make her a little cup with a pinch of cinnamon. And now these couple of days, Avery made it for her. That´s the least any of them could do. But not even that helped. "There must be something we could do." Avery sight. Speaking silently so that Sophie couldn´t hear them, while preparing breakfast. " We can´t. " Benny whispered. **I can´t **he meant to say. **I´am unable to help her.**

The restless nights were making Sophie tired and weak. But she could not sleep. Her mind was clouded. Never keeping silent. Her body could barley stand without holding on to something. Yet she could not sit. Her eyes felt heavy but closing them, made her see her father´s face. She acted very emotionally and aggressive. Arguing most of the time. She had no appetite. Whatever Benny laid in front of her, she refused to eat. Or she would take a few bites and puke it out. Cause her stomach couldn´t digest the food properly.

Whenever Sophie passed by a mirror, she made halt and walked back. She looked at herself, for several minutes, and remembered her eight years old self. And saw no difference in who she is now and who she had been once. Helpless. Scared. Alone. Her father had been almost a stranger, she had to live with. It had taken her months. Long painful months too slowly start to accustom in her new life. That father was gone now. And left was a little girl. A scared, helpless little girl. Who was not alone but felt alone.

The breakfast went silent. Like every other morning, since her father´s death. And every other meal. Just a **C**_**an you pass me the butter, please ?**_ _**What ya doing today ? I couldn´t sleep. **_Meaningless chatter to fill the silence. To make it seem like nothing happened. That everything is normal. But it wasn´t and it would never be. Not for me Sophie repeated in her head. They might have forgotten him but not me. I won´t. **Never.** But those meaningless words were for Sophie. In truth there was nothing to say. Absolutely nothing.


	4. Chapter 3 part 2

This is still a part of the previous chapter. I just cut it out because I´m a messy writer, and needed more space. By the way I´m sorry to those who read my fic and I let them wait months. Like I said I´m messy and there is no easy explanation. And thank you for reading. It means a lot.

* * *

"I don´t think we should leave her." Charlie said so loosely. As if Sophie wasn´t in the same room. As if... as if she wasn´t hearing, those words. The words that left her mouth, like it meant nothing. The red headed woman, had no idea, how they would linger, and bore into Sophie´s head. But Bobby knew. He knew Sophie in and out. He watched her. Her eyes, directed at her hands. Her way of showing how ashamed she felt. Bobby hated seeing her like this.

"I´ll stay with her." Charlie said. Her voice lacked sincerity, so Bobby refused. She began to insist. Which only made Bobby furious. He trusted no one with her. Not when she was in this state. "Enough", he shouted. Letting his rage out. Spitting the words. It always burst out of him, his anger. No matter who stood in front of him. Pointing his finger at Charlie, he breathing in. Trying to control it. "If anyone stays, it´s me." He breathed out. Letting his hand fall to his side. For awhile his eyes lingered on Sophie. Her eyes were still on her hands. Then he left the living room and confused heads watched him go.

With heavy legs he went upstairs. Holding on to the banister. Each step was harder. And arriving took longer. Once he passed through his bedroom door, he let his shoulders fall. Turning around and closing the door, felt like the most difficult and draining thing he has done, in a long time. He sat on his bed and eyes fixed on the floor. Not blinking then closing them. She had lost everyone but the lose of her father, took what she had left of a family. "Only Sam remained.", Bobby sigh. Grabbing his phone from is jeans pocket. Making a call he hoped would led him somewhere.

When the clock showed 1:00 pm, one by one everyone left the house. Only Sophie stayed. Neither Bobby nor Benny, wanted to leave her, all by herself. Both men were afraid. Afraid that something might happen to her. Afraid that she might do something to herself. And no one would be with her. But both men also knew, she needed some time for herself. Time to breath. Time to mourn in peace. Time...to think. And so they decided to leave her. With a fear of yesterday creeping in the back.

Garth went back home yesterday evening, to Nebraska. "Stay please." Sophie had begged, the night he left. Her grip on him tight and her nails bored in his flesh. Bobby and Benny tried to get her off of him. But Sophie refused to let go. She had screamed, cried and begged. Terrified to loss yet another person whom she loved. "I will come as soon as my exam´s are over, and I will call everyday. I promise." Garth said, with honesty written on his face. But those were just words. Settled in her ears but her brain refused to welcome.

As much as Benny didn´t want to go, he knew, he had to. And he had no intention, to take Sophie with him. He knew it would cause her more pain. "Call me, when you want to." Benny had said, and gave her a kiss on her forehead. He had hesitated, before he finally left with Avery. Normally Sophie would be jealous of Avery. But that was another thing which she lost. Alongside her hunger and sleep.

Benny didn´t want her to sit in silence, lost in her thoughts. So she sat across from a turned on TV. But the distraction did not last long. And she rememberd. A road. A long road that seemed not to end. With her father beside her. Driving hours and hours to get from one place to another. 5 weeks just the two of them and the long roads. Underneath them. Time did not seem to pass when Sophie was younger. But once she grew, each year became shorter than the one before. She wished she could relived those times.

She used her hands to lift herself from the floor. Leaving the TV turned on, and walking towards the book shelf. ´´I´m so dumb. I´m so dumb." Sophie yelled. Hitting her head with her hands. She had not much time. And some of it, wasted remembering old days. Sophie groaned in frustration. She grabbed a pile of books and lay them down on Booby´s desk. To nervous to sit.

Her hands were shacking, as she opened the cover of the first book. She did not know what to look for. Desperately devouring one page after another. Putting the pile of books back when she was finished. It cost her time but saved her from explanations. She lifted her head. Her eyes scanning the books she had not read yet. Sighing she rubbed her face with her hands.

Once or twice she peeked at the clock behind her. An unnecessary act. How many books she had read. She had not counted. How much time left. She could not count. Hope. It had never been on her side. Yet she held the last book she would read in her hand. The word please formed on her lips. "If in this book isn´t an answer to my ...", her brain forbid her to continue the sentence.

She flipped through the first few pages. Her eyes and mind on every word. And finally at page 21 she found a spell. A spell to a parallel universe. She knew she had no time. No time to find more books. No time to find something better. And after all, Sophie was a child who just desperately wanted to see her father. The rest didn´t matter. And it never crossed her mind, that in a parallel universe, her father might not be the same man.

The ingredients for the spell were: dead sea brine, lamb´s blood and bones of a lesser saint. For a moment she questioned herself. Lamb´s blood and bones of a lesser saint. How would I get that stuff and were would I get that she thought. Then she told herself, she would do anything to see her father. No matter what. She remembered that Bobby had ingredients, for spells and such all around his house. "How could I forget ?´´ She felt angry at herself. Maybe I find one of those ingredients here, she tried to think positive. And just like that, one by one she found them.

But Sophie hadn´t thought it would be this easy. She questioned herself more then once. And even questioned her plan. Because it felt surreal. To easy to be true. ´´Maybe there is something I missed.´´ And by the time she collected the ingredients Bobby and Beth arrived. So she ran upstairs to hid them in her room. Tonight she would see her father again. Nothing and no one and would make her stay.


End file.
